This time I did it! Not often, but this time… I kept my mouth shut! This time I did not defend myself, I did not speak up. God’s grace equipped me and empowered me to learn humility and learn “mild” oppression as a 20-year-old. It was a good, good thing.
I was a sophomore and passionately pursuing the Lord at Pitt. My roommate, Kris, was not. She was a good friend from freshman year; outgoing, personable, fun, the life of the party, popular. Then I stumbled upon a paper she wrote featuring, yours truly—Kelly. The paper (for some psych or sociology class) was about her experience living with a Christian. It talked wildly about prayer candles (not so!), weirdo vigils (untrue!) and my badgering of her in a proselytizing way (that hurt!). She smeared my character and my style. It hurt.
Although her paper was filled with mockery and lies, we remained “friends”. The Lord was showing me that it was not me she did not like, it ultimately was Jesus Himself. If they hated him, they would hate me. Did I think I was above that? I wanted desperately to “win her” to Christ after this. A confrontation was not something that was going to change anything. Her mind was made up. I was a religious fanatic and freak. In time, the friendship did break down. The experience grew me in humility and in the understanding of forgiveness and grace in profound ways. Ultimately, a great gift!
From Mark 15:4-5: “‘See how many charges they bring against you?’ But Jesus made no further answer, so that Pilate was amazed.”
Why was he amazed? Perhaps because Jesus practiced self-control. He knew it was not beneficial to defend Himself and so He didn’t. He was perfectly fulfilling Isaiah 53:7 “He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth.”
Jesus had one driving goal in mind—the journey to the cross. He was not going to defend himself, or debate people, or be loud and yell (like the crowd ending up doing by shouting “Barabbas!”). He chose to be mistreated rather than seek the glory and the defense He deserved.
Let’s face it, there is one reason and one reason alone that I constantly want to defend myself when I am treated poorly. Pride. Other times, I defend myself when I am in the wrong instead of humbly listening to correction. How about you? Can you choose to remain silent and trust Jesus to avenge you and right the wrong done to you? This is what is amazing. He will do it.
Ask God to teach you wisdom in this area and how to image Christ more fully in silence and in speech. He will do it!
For worship this week, read Mark 15:1-15.
- What do you think was the Jewish religious leaders’ goal in sending Jesus to Pilate? (Verse 1)
- What do you observe about Jesus’ character? (Verses 2-5)
- Why do you think Jesus did not defend Himself? Do you like this? Are you uncomfortable with this? Ponder this more.
- Why do you think the text says that Pilate “amazed” at Jesus’ silence (Verse 5)?
- Does Jesus’ example teach us that we should never defend ourselves? Why or why not? How are you doing with knowing “when to speak and when to remain silent” like our Lord?